“The little things? The little moments? They aren’t little. ” Jon Kabat-Zinn
In a society that rewards busyness over peace of mind it can be difficult to remember what really matters. Every year I see a meme on Facebook that reminds me of the kind of person I want to be. It suggests your holiday to do list look more like this; BE present instead of buying presents. WRAP someone in a hug instead of wrapping gifts. SEND peace instead of gifts. DONATE food instead of shopping for food. And BE the light instead of seeing the lights.
What seemingly “little” things can you do this holiday season?
What if you were simply PRESENT?
The idea of being “present” may seem vague but it simply means to be fully here in this moment. Get out of your head, forget the “to do” list, quit regretting the past, quit fearing the future. No, it is not hard. Simply take a breath and come back to this moment.Take many, many mindful breaths. You give the gift of someone being heard and validated when you are present when in their presence. If you can come from this frame of mind when dealing with a difficult boss, employee, or patient, a child throwing a tempter tantrum, or a crazy relative, you will have peace of mind.
Monday mornings I used to volunteer to teach mindfulness to elementary students. I was amazed at the children’s ideas on ways they could express kindness. From picking up dropped pencils, to opening up doors, to sharing, to simply offering to see how they can be of help. All simple thoughtful acts of kindness.
Sometimes we think we need to give “BIG” for it to be significant. Or that what we give needs to be concrete or visual for it to matter. That is not true.
What if your boss, employee, or patient really needs a break or has personal issues far beyond average? What if the child that appears to be out of control having a meltdown is simply tired, hungry or over stimulated? What if the crazy relative has financial issues or depression? Would you respond to them differently knowing these things? Why? Why not just be generous with kindness because it feels good?
To be understanding, to offer validation, to give a hug, to smile, to express gratitude, to laugh, to be present, to offer your time, your expertise, your help and your support, and to be present, these are the presents worth giving. Random, simple, acts of kindness.
Mindfulness Matters for Health, Relationships, and Success Reduce burnout and improve communication and resiliency through mindfulness and emotional intelligence. Training and Coaching
What if this year instead of only giving presents you gave the gift of your presence? Now don’t wrap yourself in a box or let your ego get involved here… What I am suggesting is that you be more present, that you be more mindful.
The idea of being “present” may seem vague but it simply means to be fully here in this moment. Get out of your head, forget the “to do” list, quit regretting the past, quit fearing the future. No, it is not hard. Simply take a breath and come backto this moment in time. Take many, many mindful breaths. You give the gift of someone being heard and validated when you are present when in their presence. This is generosity. If you can come from this frame of mind when dealing with a difficult boss or employee to patient, a child throwing a tempter tantrum, or a crazy relative you will have peace of mind.
Generosity is mindfully giving in a way that makes you feel good.
Monday mornings I volunteer to teach mindfulness to elementary students. I was amazed at the children’s ideas on ways they could express generosity. From picking up dropped pencils, to opening up doors, to sharing, to simply offering to see how they can be of help. All simple acts of kindness.
Sometimes we think we need to give “BIG” for it to be significant. Or that what we give needs to be concrete or visual for it to matter. That is not true.
What if your boss, employee, or patient really needs a break or has personal issues far beyond average? What if the child that appears to be out of control having a meltdown is simply tired, hungry or over stimulated? What if the crazy relative has financial issues or depression? Would you respond to them differently knowing these things? Why? Why not just be generous with kindness because it feels good to give?
To be understanding, to offer validation, to give a hug, to smile, to express gratitude, to laugh, to be present, to offer your time, your expertise, your help and your support, and to be present, these are the presents worth giving. Random, simple, acts of kindness. This is generosity.
Be present. Be mindful. Be kind. Be generous. It will all come back to you tenfold and rest assured you will be blessed with happiness and peace of mind.
What ways will be present and generous?
Amy McCae
Certified Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher
Amy McCae is a Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher in Omaha, Nebraska. She is passionate about healing and helping others and especially about mindfulness and emotional intelligence.
Amy spent her childhood dreaming of being a doctor only to watch her other die of cancer when she was 20. Her life took an entirely different direction after that and she spent much of her 20’s sick with chronic illnesses.
One day Amy was too sick to take care of her newborn baby and she had to crawl to the phone to call for help. Amy then went on a quest to heal and looked in places she never knew existed before that day. AND she healed largely through fitness, nutrition, and meditation.
The experience allowed her to rediscover her passion for healing and helping others. Amy now holds numerous certifications allowing her to be of support to individuals and organizations. Mindfulness Matters is an accredited 8-week online course rooted in science and inspired by her desire to help others develop emotional intelligence (especially leaders and those struggling with self-doubt and overwhelm). Please contact Amy for more information and to sign up!
Holiday season… This beautiful time of the year brings with it some challenges. More money, more time, more work, crazy family, and more events scheduled on the calendar can all be a recipe for disaster and feeling stressed. I am confident you understand what I mean. However…
What if I told you that at any given time you have the power to make the decision whether or not you feel stressed? Your power always lies in your awareness of this moment.
For many years I have shared a set of skills with specific tools to help people manage stress, create healthier and happier lives, and think more positively. Originally there were only 4 main concepts but about 4 years ago I revised it and even added a 5th. Now this tool box has developed into a journey of self-discovery that even supports improving relationships. Challenging boss at a work party? Crazy family member you have to see this year?
The path to less stress begins with self-empowerment.
The five ideas you will do well to consider are; Awareness, Acceptance, Attitude, Action, and Acknowledgment.
AWARENESS because ignorance is not always bliss. This is first because it is most important. If you don’t know the details of a situation how can you resolve an issue? If you don’t know yourself how can you be authentic and make conscious decisions? Awareness begins with understanding yourself, your core values, and my favorite: your emotional processes. When you think, speak, and act inline with your core values you live an empowered and successful life. Core Values types of worksheets and meditation would be my first set of suggestions for developing any level of self-awareness.
ACCEPTANCE. Have you ever heard that phrase that being angry is like swallowing poison and expecting the other person to die? Well… get over being mad. You are only hurting yourself. AND learn to love yourself. Yes, I am aware that it sounds corny and that is suggested sometimes half-heartedly but… these are absolutely necessary steps to peace of mind. Imposter Syndrome runs rampant it seems. Try “Heartfelt or Living Kindness” Meditation to cultivate compassion for yourself. Consider writing a list of the people you are upset or angry with, why, the emotions you feel, and then burn that sh**. You don’t have control over other people and what they do don’t allow their behavior to control you.
You may not have control over people but you do have control over your ATTITUDE. Attitude is all about your perception. I mean seriously think about this for a moment… Let’s say you are looking at an image of an optical illusion and you are only seeing it one way, but then someone comes along and points out an entirely different image. YOUR perception just changed and you now have two ideas and BOTH are correct! Always, take a moment to take a breath before you speak or act. This will save you and others so much heartache. You never really know what the other person is going through and you never know what you may learn. Make authentic and conscious decisions inline with your values.
Ready, set, ACTION. Let’s keep this simple. Set some clear goals in only 1 or 2 areas of your life and write specific steps. CHOOSE WHAT YOU LOVE not what you think you are suppose to do. Then, get an accountability partner or hire a life coach. Just be clear on your vision and purpose.
Last but most certainly not least we have ACKNOWLEDGMENT. This is simply gratitude. There is no easier way to shift energy and create happiness than to practice being appreciative. Some creative ways to be grateful are to volunteer/be of service or create a joy jar where you make notes of happy moments and put them in a jar to read at a later time. I found it much easier to get into the actual feeling of being grateful when I shared my appreciation with a friend. Just do it. Do it regularly. It will bring more things to be grateful for into your life.
Each one of these ideas/skills has the potential to lower your stress level. AND more! If you would like more ideas and more specific practices for each one please contact me. I offer a downloadable extended version as well as a 21 Day Gratitude and Kindness Email Challenge.
Choose wisely. Stress Less. Be Happy.
Thank you,
Amy McCae
Certified Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher
Amy McCae is a Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher in Omaha, Nebraska. She is passionate about healing and helping others and especially about mindfulness and emotional intelligence.
Amy spent her childhood dreaming of being a doctor only to watch her other die of cancer when she was 20. Her life took an entirely different direction after that and she spent much of her 20’s sick with chronic illnesses.
One day Amy was too sick to take care of her newborn baby and she had to crawl to the phone to call for help. Amy then went on a quest to heal and looked in places she never knew existed before that day. AND she healed largely through fitness, nutrition, and meditation.
The experience allowed her to rediscover her passion for healing and helping others. Amy now holds numerous certifications allowing her to be of support to individuals and organizations. Mindfulness Matters is an accredited 8-week online course rooted in science and inspired by her desire to help others develop emotional intelligence (especially leaders and those struggling with self-doubt and overwhelm). Please contact Amy for more information and to sign up!
Christmas 2015 at my dad’s house :). I love my family!
Oh… holiday season. The time of the year when we are reminded to be grateful, joyful, and of the dynamics of our family relationships.
I believe people are in our lives for a reason. I don’t believe in accidents. I believe that if you look closely at your relationships that you gain an understanding of yourself, that you heal parts of you that hurt, and that you cultivate compassion for yourself and others. The world needs this and so do your family and friends. People, both the ones you adore and the ones that challenge you, are there to teach you. Your experiences with others can bring you great joy and peace and transform your world if you pay attention.
This year as you head out to go shopping, as you wrap presents, decorate the house, bake goodies, and attend family gatherings be mindful. Instead of just going through the motions be present. Don’t just buy presents, be present. Take the time to be grateful. Take the time to breath. Take the time to listen. Take the time to feel. Take the time to be kind. Take the time to laugh. You may be surprised how much better each day and each moment is when you can take the time to be mindful.
This year give more hugs, spend more time, love more deeply and cherish each moment. Make a gratitude list and share it with your family. Donate food, donate your time. Take a nap, play a game, read a book, learn to knit, see a play, or simply have tea with friends. Are time for peace, love and joy.
Excellence in Love is a program that I created teaching relationship skills. The practices are Awareness, Acceptance, Attitude, Action, and Acknowledgment. The practices create a new level of self-awareness allowing you to live an authentic and empowered. If you would like a FREE pdf please email me at creativewellness@cox.net You can also listen to me speak about these skills by visiting my website www.amymccae.com (rated #6 out of 40 speakers, top 3 were the organizers, Vibrant Life Summit)
I am the oldest of four children all who are married with children. Our children range from age 20 to one on the way! My mother is not alive and I am divorced so we are missing a few in this pictures. The past six years both of my grandmother’s, both of my father’s sisters, a man that was like a grandfather to me, and a brother and sister of my mother’s have all left this world. This picture is my immediate family and includes my then 94 year old grandfather who is still watching football and even occasionally drinks beer.
Amy McCae 