Control Freak or Anxiety Ridden?

I’m not bossy and I’m not a control freak. I just have better ideas than you.

Sometimes when people appear to be bossy or controlling there is more to the story…

As child I remember being meticulous about things being in order. My clothes in my closet faced a certain direction and were hung colored coded and according to season, my music alphabetized, and my grades perfect. I worked hard to control every aspect of my environment.

As an adult I have often done the same things to an even deeper extent both personally and professionally. I strive for excellence in all that I do and used to wish I could control people, places, and events so that they quit messing up my plans.

Middle age and painful life experiences have this way of insuring that you deal with your sh*t. In my late thirties I began having panic attacks to the point of not being able to function for hours afterwards. I also started waking up having panic attacks thinking I was going to die. Imagine waking up not being able to breath or control your body… Looking back I always had anxiety but was masking it in any way I could.

Through a lot of personal development work I realized that deep down I am not a control freak after all. When I feel anxious I will try to find something to control. The other night I was cooking and thinking about a personal situation that was hurting me. Suddenly I felt the need to organize, control, and clean something. Instead of doing that I stopped, took a breath, and asked myself what was really going.

“People with anxiety don’t have a train of thought. We have 7 trains on 4 tracks that narrowly avoid each other when the paths cross and all the conductors are screaming.” (Survivors Stand Tall/ Facebook)

Meditation and mindfulness have been my saving Grace. They have taught me how to breath, how to focus, and how to help myself. What I have learned is that I am not controlling but I do sometimes experience anxiety. The source of that anxiety is caused by my thoughts and feelings about a situation or person that I don’t have control over. Why would I want to control the person or situation? Because I feel insecure, unworthy, unsafe and that scares me. FEAR…

The next time you find yourself feeling the need to control a situation or the next time you notice you are feeling anxious try asking yourself some questions:

What is this really about?

What emotion am I feeling?

What outcome do I want?

How can I be at peace with this person or situation if it doesn’t turn out as I would like?

What things can I do for myself to create the my preferred feelings?

Not everyone experiences anxiety the same way. If you have anxiety or panic attacks please make sure you see the proper professional for you.

Wishing peace and joy.

Many Blessings,

Amy McCae

Certified Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher

Free phone consultation

Amy McCae is a Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher in Omaha, Nebraska. She is passionate about healing and helping others. Amy holds numerous certifications allowing her to support individuals and organizations.

Mindfulness Matters is an accredited, neuroscience based, emotional intelligence program created for developing visionary and conscious leaders. Many leaders struggle with self-doubt and overwhelm. This course insures you gain clarity, confidence, success, and will even help improve your relationships and health!!

Amy spent her childhood dreaming of being a doctor only to watch her mother die of cancer when she was 20. Her life took an entirely different direction after that and she spent much of her 20’s sick with chronic illnesses.

One day Amy was too sick to take care of her newborn baby and she had to crawl to the phone to call for help. Amy then went on a quest to heal and looked in places she never knew existed before that day. AND she healed largely through fitness, nutrition, and meditation.

Contact Amy today!!!


Fitness, Nutrition, and Meditation Saved my Life

While doing some website updating I took a moment to read what I wrote many years ago about my journey to healing. Part of being mindful includes practicing self-awareness so that you can make conscious decisions inline with your values. I love my history, it reminds me of who I am and what I am suppose to do. Fitness, nutrition, and meditation saved my life on multiple levels and for that I am grateful.

As a child I was fascinated by the medical community. I remember watching the show “Emergency” when I was I only three. The show’s storyline was about paramedics and firemen; Johnny, Roy, and Captain. I even named my fish after them and my parents sent me birthday cards with stickers from them for years. I collected doctor supplies and asked for medical books. I wrapped sprained ankles and made strips out of bandages for cuts. I knew I was going to be a doctor when I grew up.

During college I was torn between my fascination with medicine and my love of the arts and literature. Chemistry challenged me and English and literature came naturally. I contemplated teaching as opposed to medical school. Then, when I was only 20 my mother died of cancer. She had been diagnosed when I was seventeen and then again when I was twenty. She died four months later, but not without a tremendous fight. My fascination ended. The magic and power extinguished after watching what my mother endured. She chose surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation because she believed that was the only way she would live to raise her four children. They failed, she left this world at 41.

My life took an entire new direction after that. During this time I developed multiple chronic health problems including Interstitial Cystitis, Fibromyalgia, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and countless other issues. Fortunately none of them would kill me, just make me miserable and affect my ability to live day to day life and contemplate suicide. (I often went to the bathroom 30-40 times a day and I had 9, yes 9, Urologists, none of which helped). Doctors discounted me and became frustrated when their tests and prescriptions failed.

Eventually I became so sick that I could not get out of bed to take care of my child. I was in so much pain that I literally crawled to the telephone and called my sister and asked her to come get my baby. That day changed my life forever. I began a quest to find the answers that would allow my body to heal. I searched for information in places I didn’t even know existed before that day. I found that your body has an innate ability to heal itself if you treat it properly and if you remove whatever blocks may be in the way. I changed my whole life through fitness, nutrition, and meditation.

My experiences taught me that the Universe has a way of showing you exactly what you should do if you pay attention and follow your intuition. I was never supposed to be a doctor or a college professor. My life’s purpose is to teach wellness and support healing. With this revelation I began seeking certifications that would allow me to be a qualified holistic practitioner and with the help of a Life Coach began professionally assisting people create healthier and happier lives.

Currently I hold numerous certifications related to holistic wellness from Certified Personal Trainer to Certified Life Coach to Reiki/Shaman to Certified Mindfulness Meditation Teacher and MORE. I have done numerous radio shows and have published blogs and MORE. It is a wonderful journey!

In my practice I focus on Mindfulness as I believe it can be applied to every aspect of your life including fitness, nutrition, relationships and MORE. Mindfulness really does matter.

If you would like to learn more please set up a free phone consultation

Thank you,

Amy McCae

Certified Life Coach and Mindfulness Meditation Teacher

Mindfulness Matters is an 8-week accredited, neuroscience based, emotional intelligence program created for developing conscious, visionary leaders. In this course you will gain self-confidence and begin making decisions that honor you. Your level of self-awareness will sky rocket allowing you to truly know who you are as well as what you need and want. Your communication and relationship skills will dramatically improve allowing you to ask for what you need and want at work and at home AND get it. Your relationships will improve. Your level of happiness will grow. Your health and vitality will increase. You will naturally learn to make conscious decisions allowing you to live in line with your values and purpose.

Spirituality and Death

Being a holistic practitioner I am often curious about the body, mind, and of course, spirit. This curiosity lead me to many experiences in learning about life, death, and spirit. These experiences would transform my life. This past week brought several deep reminders of what death means. The subject of death and dealing with potentially terminally ill family came up at a meeting I host, Evolving Minds. Tomorrow, Saturday morning marks 20 years since my mother left this world. The past 6 months brought two eye opening experiences about my own mortality, and the past 10 years have been filled with surprises from the spiritual world.

I was only 20 when I lost my mother. She was only 41. As I sit here 40 years old and 20 years later I can not imagine being in her place. I can not imagine knowing I was going to die and leave my children. I have no idea how one prepares for such an event. I do not know what she would be like much past my own age now. I often wonder what kind of grandmother she would be and if she would be proud of who I grew up to be. And I even wonder what she would look like since I look so much like her. There is something that changes in a person when one reaches the age of their parent’s death. There is something that changes within a daughter when she loses a mother so young and spends decades wondering what it would be like to have a mother. The pain I felt eventually lead me to peace.

I have never believed in actual death. I have always believed that there was some part of me that would transcend this world. What that may look like or feel like I do not know, but I am receiving glimpses. My 40th birthday was in May and close to that time I had an experience that left me confident that there was an aspect of me that was not my physical body. That part of me was free. I spent the day crying and convincing myself that it was ok stay, I had things to finish here. I vowed to remember those feelings of peace and freedom and to carry them with me in this world. Then, late this summer I had an episode where I lost consciousness and someone had to revive me. I have no recollection of the event. Everything was black. And I wondered if that was what death was like?

Over the past 10 years I have had countless experiences that were not of this world. Some of them included loved ones who have passed. I do not have an explanation for this. I have tried to use science and that helps, but it can not really express the magnitude of such experiences. I am forever grateful to those loved ones that have reappeared reminding me that death is not real. Reminding me that some aspect of them is still with me. Thank you mom, Mr. Hennessey, Felix, and Ben Johnson. I loved you when you were here and I love you now.

These experiences allow me to have a greater respect for life. I take things a little slower, I am a little easier on myself, things that bothered me are easier to let go of, and I love people and experiences so much more deeply. I honor the experiences, even the painful ones like the loss of loved ones. Those experiences remind me of who I AM. Today, take some time to honor your life and your path and to also honor those that may no longer be here with you in the same way. Those loved ones may be closer than you thought.

Amy McCae
Holistic Life Coach

Religion and Politics

Yes, I chose a rather simple title. However, these two subjects tend to evoke a tremendous amount of emotion in many people. The writing that follows comes from my heart. These are my personal experiences and feelings and when I write I intend to inspire those reading to open their minds to other possibilities and to be aware enough to simply choose peace.

Well… Recently an event occurred and I wasn’t feeling to peaceful when I received a rather startling email related to my blog. Not only did this woman offer a great deal of advice to me in regards to religion but also in business or what we could call politics. The unfortunate thing was that this advice was written in such a way that my colleagues were even shocked. We did exchange a few emails and I really did try to explain myself and quite frankly was rather ticked that I felt I needed to. Her last email really did not make sense to me. However, her demeanor had changed drastically so…

I wish her well as well as all of you. All those who agree with me and support me and those who feel differently as well. I hope that this woman and anyone reading this will channel that intense emotion and energy that surfaces from debates on religion and politics and uses it for good. Using it for good means embracing that emotion and instead of choosing to criticize or ridicule someone, choosing to find out all you can about that person and their religion and politics in general. Choose to learn and explore and allow yourself to evolve. You don’t have to like them, what they do, or what they stand for. Just be open to possibilities as you never know where that road may take you. You also never know what road they have traveled or are traveling.Variety is the spice of life, right? How boring would it be if we are exactly the same?

You see, to me religion is really a business. Not that people do not find God through religion, they do. However, these are organizations that have to operate with rules, have staff, and pay bills so… Business it is. Everyone sticks to defending their religion like flies on fly paper. This does not make sense to me. I will use Christianity as an example only because I was raised Christian and because here in the United States it seems prevalent. As a child I never could make sense of it. As an adult I have the same questions. How can you defend a religion and make another wrong if one you do not have the entire story, two you are reading a translated version, three there is a huge amount of difference in the teachings depending on the church, clergy man, or even the part of the world, and fourth and most importantly how can you make another religion wrong? Does that mean that only “Christians” go to heaven? And if so what in the world is spiritual about that?

Notice all of the questions I have asked. I am extraordinarily curious AND I love it that way! I have no desire to sit back passively and assume anything about religion, health care, politics, business or anything else. There is nothing about that is empowering or inspiring to me. I choose to explore all of my options. I research everything that I feel passionately about. I do that because  it feels good to me and it has changed my life. Because of my knowledge and experience I have been able to help other people change their lives too.

If I had not been so determined and so curious I could have spent my life chronically ill feeling sorry myself. I did spend 10 years sick and I decided to “color outside the lines” and go against the norm and now because of that I am happier and healthier. My decision to explore holistic healing lead me down a rather lonely road initially. Many of my friends and family did not understand. There were many times when I was sad because I felt so much better and had learned so much that I wanted them to embrace my new ways of living. Eventually I gained confidence and am determined to let the world know all that I learned.

What I learned was that there are many paths to healing and many paths to God. Not one is right and not one is wrong. I believe that healing comes from God. I believe that knowledge and awareness will support you and empower you to create great things in this world. I believe that in this world we are spiritual beings having a human experience. I believe that if we all questioned everything our minds would evolve. I believe that if we spent more time playing like children and in awe over our amazing ability to create that there would be more joy in the world. I believe that when we remember who we truly it is then that we find peace.

Find God. Find peace. Follow your heart. Find a way to do good with what you know.

Thank you.

Amy S McCae

Wellness and Lifestyle Coach













Struggling to find a topic to write about today I “Googled” my favorite subject: Mind Power.  The power of the mind kept me curious as a child and as adult it has become my passion.  The complexity and power of thought is profound.  The power in the unfamiliar silence without thought just as magnificent and perhaps the place of most peace. Often it the place we seldom visit!!!  My fascination with the ability quiet the chatter as well as use the thoughts we do have for good continues to grow. My desire to teach this feels as though I have finally fine tuned a purpose in my life. Please email me for information on classes and private sessions

The poem below caught my attention when looking to feel inspired and I found it  The site has some interesting information for those curious about the power of the mind.  Think about this poem:


Mind is not a constant, its concentration waxes and wanes.  When the mind wanes the smallest you take action and follow through the next action.  Don’t let your spirit drop. Thoughts are at the top of a hill. Unchecked and attended the water will begin to flow down one part of the slope and will begin to form a well-worn gully. You’ve got to divert the spring at its source.